i feel good (i didn’t know that i would)

When I was younger I liked telling people that a 10 mg Valium first thing in the morning was how God wanted me to feel. Today the prescription is different. 300 mg of Welbutrin, 50 to 100 mg of Zoloft, a moderate amount of relatively healthy food, a brisk 50 minute walk, and a macadamia nut cookie (one) is how God wants me to feel. Five hours of good sleep seems to have put me over the top. (With only the last three spent tossing and turning instead of vice-versa.) Additionally the 200 mg of Celebrex seems to be controlling my back pain. I figured if three Lortab 10s wouldn’t phase the pain, nothing short of IV Demerol would. I guess it’s a different kind of pain. It’s hard to believe that two and three months ago I was praying for death and about to accomplish that goal, indirectly, with booze and dope. What a difference a couple of months can make. Just wanted to go on record with that. I hope some of this is coming your way and soon.


11 Responses to “i feel good (i didn’t know that i would)”

  1. 1 Maia March 12, 2008 at 1:49 pm

    Congratulations! Glad you are feeling better.

  2. 2 Nusku... March 12, 2008 at 3:23 pm

    Well done ! I hope it keeps getting better

  3. 3 untreatable March 12, 2008 at 5:03 pm

    Hey. Glad to hear your feeling good. Quick question here: Your Zoloft dosage differs from day to day? I would think that would put your brain into chaos mode.

  4. 4 Prester John March 12, 2008 at 6:08 pm

    untreatable – I’ve only been back on the Zoloft for about a month. The shrink started me at 100 mg. After a few days at that level my hands started shaking badly. So I tried it the 50 one day, 100 the next. Can’t tell the difference except that my hands shake, a little, on the 100 mg days.

    A psych nurse told me years ago that Zoloft was safe and that if I had a date, it would be alright to skip a day to make sure there was lead in my pencil. Obviously she overestimated my power over the fairer sex, but that’s another story entirely

  5. 5 misterbooks March 12, 2008 at 7:30 pm

    Glad to hear your doing fine, and on the right track. I too, am switching gears, trying the healthy eating, simplier stuff, again. Love the handle, Prestor John…..

  6. 6 angryballerina March 12, 2008 at 8:11 pm

    Part of me is thrilled for you.
    The other part wants you where I am.

  7. 7 Prester John March 12, 2008 at 9:01 pm

    angryballerina – I’m hesitant to post the good times for two reasons. First, I don’t want to rub it in. Second, and certainly the more important, is that I don’t want to jinx myself. I don’t like to feel like I’m losing when I can’t maintain. Like it’s my fault or something.

    Anyway, I’ll blog the bad times too, I promise. I’ve got a whole lot of work to do, so I doubt today was much more than a brief respite.

    I hope you’re feeling better soon.

    You’re kind of scary sometimes. But I love ya.

  8. 8 angryballerina March 12, 2008 at 10:06 pm

    Post the good times, it gives you shit to look back on and hold on to. I’m scary? Funny, I was just thinking that you guys (my readers) know me better than my friends and family….

  9. 9 Prester John March 13, 2008 at 6:28 am

    angryballerina – You’re complicated. You don’t show your blogger side to them to protect them. That’s the side we that know you through your blog love you (most) for. You’re edgy-volatile-honest and that’s exciting and scary. I suspect some of that is a front to protect your sweet-sensitive side. Wouldn’t tell you that in person, though, for fear you’d kick me in the nuts.

  10. 10 cori1047 March 13, 2008 at 4:53 pm

    I assume that Lortab 10’s are the approximate equivalent of Norco 10’s. That must have been some kind of pain! Celebrex is some kind of a wonder drug as far as I’m concerned. 200 mg twice a day got me off the cane and just about back to my usual walking speed (2 or 3 paces in front of everyone else, that is). That and 10 mg. prednisone every other day and I’m as near to “normal” as I ever get.

    Chronic pain sucks swamp reed, doesn’t it?

  11. 11 Prester John March 13, 2008 at 7:18 pm

    cori1047 – I’m not sure what Norcos are. Lortab are some sort of synthetic opiate (I think) that is commonly prescribed for sinus pain, dental pain, kidney stones, and I guess anything else. I suppose their are different kinds of pain inasmuch as there are definitely different kinds of things that work on different pains. Lortab easily controlled the pain associated with a big-time, multi-visit root canal I had some years back. I’d have probably been a straight jacket without something. The back pain is different. It just continues to “tighten up” until I get off my feet, either by sitting down or passing out. Yeah. Pain sucks.

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